WILLYS JOKES

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=90 BGCOLOR="#006699" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="02c285a1erlcgo.png"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#FFCC66" FACE="Arial" ><B>Willys New Joint</B></FONT><B>     |     </B><A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Willys New Joint"><B>home</B></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id22.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Photo Album"><B><IMG SRC="03b0e0e0.png" border=0 width="14" height="14" ALT="up" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></A><B>   </B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="14" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" WIDTH="14"><B>     </B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="14" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" WIDTH="14"><B>  </B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="14" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" WIDTH="14"></div> <div> </div> </td> </tr><tr> <td valign="top" width=210 BGCOLOR="#FFCC66" TEXT="#080000" background="02ad2c00dkelyh.png"> <div> <IMG SRC="2e2c8960.jpg" border=0 width="200" height="150" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="2e4c8860.jpg" border=0 width="200" height="134" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></div> </td> <td valign="top" height=390 width="100%" BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <I>WILLYS JOKES</I></div> <div> Since I've been online I been sending WILLYS JOKES __/__/__ (insert date). So far I haven't had to use a different server, i.e., Yahoo, domeius, gophercentral or any other, add supported, bullshit server. I just collect the jokes and send em without lingerie, porn site or any other advertisements. I dunno about you but when I read jokes that other shit just gets in my way. I send out about 7 pages first I put a lyric, by me or somebody else, then the jokes preceeded by Willys cynical thought for the fucking day! ***WARNING**** The jokes ain't the kind you want your mommy to know you're reading. And if you can't take a joke don't bother; I often get around to offending, the easily offendable. Just remember they are words on a fucking screen nothing more! I steal probably 90% off the net as do the lists I'm stealing from so... Anyway if ya want the jokes send an email to Willybluesman87@hotmail.com and use "Willys Jokes Subscribe" in the subject line. Without further doo do here are a few of my jokes, yeah these are modified give me a fucking break!</div> <bR> <div> Willys cynical thought for the fucking day;</div> <bR> <div> What the fuck is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?</div> <bR> <div> Two Irish guys, Mulligan and O'Shea, are in a lifeboat in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, after surviving the sinking of the Titanic. Mulligan is the 'older' man, O'Shea is still young and wild!</div> <bR> <div> O'Shea says, "Mulligan what are we to do now?"</div> <bR> <div> Mulligan answers, "Sit tight young un, when the news hits they'll send rescue ships. I just wish we had something to ease the thirst."</div> <bR> <div> O'Shea, looking around the boat, "Jeeze, if they gave us oars we might be able to row to shore."</div> <bR> <div> Mulligan laughs and says, "We're smack dab in the middle of the ocean, if there was oars it would be like pissing in the sea!"</div> <bR> <div> O'Shea can't sit still, though, in the corner he lifts a blanket and out pops a bottle. "Mulligan can it be we're saved?"</div> <bR> <div> Mulligan, looks at the bottle sees there's nothing in it, sarcastically tells O'Shea, "So why don't you rub it, see what pops out?"</div> <bR> <div> O'Shea is already, enthusiastically, doing this. All of a a sudden a Magic Genie pops out. The Genie looks at the two of them and says, "Aight me boys, I'm very busy today, so I can ONLY give ya one wish. Better make it a GOOD ONE!"</div> <bR> <div> Immediately O'Shea says, "Make the ocean beer!" With a wave of its hand <Poof> the Genie disappears and the ocean is turned into Guinness Stout, the finest beer known to man. They both reach over and scoop samples out and sure enough it is beer!</div> <bR> <div> Mulligan looks at O'Shea and says, "Very smart, me young friend, now we've got to piss in the boat!"</div> <bR> <div> A BIG guy, tattooed, pierced and rough around the edges, goes into a nightclub, sits at the bar, orders a shot and a beer. After a few, he looks at the 'high-class' women, arrayed in miniskirts and diamonds for a night on the town, on his left, and says, "You women are all whores!" And goes back to drinking.</div> <bR> <div> After a few more boilermakers, to the women on his right, he says, "And you women are all bitches!"</div> <bR> <div> From his right a slinky girl starts walking toward him, he sees her and says, "Ya gotta problem wit dat?"</div> <bR> <div> "No problem but I'm NOT a bitch! She says, haughtily. "I'm just going to the other side!"</div> <bR> <div> From the table, where she was, a young voice calls, "Mommy, mommy, where are you?"</div> <bR> <div> She stops walking and says, "Will somebody shut that son of a fucking bitch up!"</div> <bR> <div> The guy starts grinning, and the 'House' bought his drinks from then on!</div> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>